My Family Writes

To those that know us the best we are not emotional rocks, ESPECIALLY THE MEN! We cry, and when we cry, we cry hard! We wear our emotions on our sleeves like good Irish, and Scottish decedents should. We often have no filter, this is very true with the two youngest men that hold the McConnell name. And when we feel emotions we feel them to the fullest of extents, no matter the emotion high or low, good or bad, our emotions run the extreme.

My family tree is not the largest, and it is littered with females thus our last names continue to expand. We are spread across the country, and across age demographics. We love all kinds of things, we have interests in sports, reading, photography. We are athletes, we are salesmen, we are engineers, we are educators, we are managers, we are McConnell's. 

We are writers. 

In full disclosure a McConnell recently departed on their own new adventure, without the rest of us. In my eyes she was the strongest McConnell. Arguably the most opinionated of us all, she knew her beliefs and was not afraid to share them. We loved her for it, and the world is better off for it. 

(She wrote this herself)

https://www.legacy.com/obituaries/stltoday/obituary.aspx?n=elizabeth-mcconnell-bj&pid=195566793

I would be lying if I said we were the closest in our family, I will be honest and say that I did not know all that she had done until recently. I knew brief snippets of all the things this powerful woman had accomplished and yes, powerful is the word to describe her. 

So many wonderful things have been written about her. It is not my place to write more about this woman that I loved with my whole heart and even more so now respect for all that she accomplished and how she captured life!

Instead I wanted to write more about my family, and how we all are writing to deal with life nowadays. My cousins write(one of them puts us all to shame), my father writes, my uncle writes, and I write. I may be biased but we are all pretty damn good at it. 

Writing gives me a voice not many expect me to have. To this day when ever I tell someone I write I get a surprised look on their face as a response. Writing has become a platform for me to share other-sides of myself. It gives me an opportunity to be creative while also sharing, what I choose to share. Getting things off my chest in a distinct way. 

My dad writes for a multitude of reasons I am sure but, often they are to voice emotions that he couldn't share in the moment, sometimes because he was getting emotional. For I believe the past 3-4 years as a new school year has come upon us he has written me a letter. He has written me when he knows I am down, he has written me when he knows I am up. The act of writing something in today's society gives it all new meaning. 

My uncle and two of my cousins currently write to grieve, to cope, to celebrate, and to reminisce. Often times bringing their readers to tears (thanks Ross). Today because of all of their writing they sparked me writing. 

Writing is a freedom, and a gateway to more of oneself, it can be a stress reliever, an outlet, or therapeutic. 

With so much of my life seemingly turned upside down, I write because I know that it can't go anywhere. 

So I ask what would you write?

One Year Removed

If you need to be caught up on my love life, and who truly owns my heart please first refer back to my heartbreak of last Valentine's Day

A year removed from my traumatic day in which I watched my first true love be towed away, we are doing okay. There have been ups and downs, highs and lows, we have been through snow storms, potholes, Ohio back roads, and hour long summer commutes to downtown Detroit, and through it all, our bond has grown stronger.

Neither of us are perfect, sometimes the radio doesn't come on the first time I start her up, sometimes I hit a curb, every so often. But she is always there for me. No matter the journey, no matter the obstacles, I know I can always count on her to get me where I am going and keep me moving forward.

When I look back on a year with one of the few constants in my life I am reminded of so many different things. Most recently I am reminded of my micro class in which we talked about selling points, and the question of at what dollar amount would you sell your car came up. We are college students and the range of cars throughout the room was very broad. When it came to me however, I stunned the room at this point in my life when I said, I would not sell my car. The memories and the story behind my car, means more to me than any dollar amount ever could.

I am not saying that our journey together will never come to an end. In my experience, all great relationships come to an end. It takes exceptional relationships to survive and thrive through life together. 

As I continue on with my journey and hopefully she continues to be a part of it, she teaches me lessons everyday.

1. Never take her for granted.

2. When she needs something do your best to give it to her.

3. Spoil her, if she needs a new outfit or she deserves a new accessory give it to her.

4. The more you give, the more you will receive.

5. Always remember that no matter the relationship, it is never always going to be perfect. But, if it is important to you, you make it work.

Mobile Home

I was asked recently what I considered home to be. And almost as if I had rehearsed it I said that "home was where I felt had shaped me into who I am and where I will always feel welcomed and at peace." For much of my life even if the actual roof over my head wasn't there I considered Florida my home.

However, over the past months and arguably year, I have realized that home does not have to be a singular place. I now know I have many homes. I have a home in Orlando, FL, I have one in Fort Lauderdale, Tampa, Ada, Ohio, Troy, Michigan, Bloomfield Hills, Michigan, Detroit, Michigan Redondo Beach, California. Just to name a few.

Home has many definitions and synonyms, household, dwelling, condominium. The definition that should be focused on, A familiar or usual setting, a congenial environment sometimes gets lost.  Home can be where ever it is needed.

The places I stated above are not places I have lived, some of them are places I have never even been. But what I do know, is that in each city I have people who care about me. Home is not a structure not a place. Home is a people.



Over the past week, I have seen and spent time with family I had not seen in months. And it was back in the state I considered home. But, that wasn't what made this vacation so important or enjoyable to me. Being surrounded by the people you care about is what makes our lives and our time so worthwhile.

I watched as my parents, aunts, and uncles journeyed down memory lane with life long friends sharing stories that will stand forever. And while these friends and stories originated in central portions of Florida the tales would be told and the laughs would be shared if the meeting was taking place in a frozen tundra.

In life we all face hardships and struggles, we also reach new heights and joys. We do not rush to a building to share in those, we run to a people. We run to those we care about and that we know care about us.

So my question is not, where is you home? but, who is your home?